How to become an internet meme: Part Uno

Consumers are strange.  Their habits are measurable and predictable, but even through all of our research, they still find ways to surprise us.  This is why I am taking on the challenge of becoming an internet meme.  The internet meme is the hot track to instant popularity.  What is the reason internet memes gain so much traction so quickly?! The world may never know, but that is not my destiny.  The old grasshopper told me, the young grasshopper, that I must endure the trials of becoming an internet meme in order to fulfill my destiny.  I am the chosen one, I am the one that will save mighty Odin from the tyrannical clutches of a three headed T-rex that goes by the name Debra! Curse you Debra! (Wikihow, teach me your ways)

Why do memes become popular?

Who are these internet plebs that turn a smiling idiot into a meme overnight? Why do people jump the meme wagon so quickly? Why is Hillary still not confirmed as being a lizard space pirate in human skin?  Well we are going to answer the first two.

Memes gain popularity so quickly because it is a rapid influx of information.  This has a strong correlation to the attention span of the average internet user.  The average attention span is approximately 8 seconds (FAT FACTS BRUH).  So let's just assess that the average person does not have the attention span to watch a lengthy video or short article, so why not memes?! Yes that is a meme reference to a Zoidberg level, I am so dank.

Another aspect about memes that make them so popular are their level of relevance, share-ability,  and story telling aspect.  Memes are pop culture references on occasion, this makes them easy to inform a large aspect of the population with a short picture and type.  The share-ability as well on the internet allows the memes to spread like wildfire.  A typical starting point for the memes are 4Chan, Reddit, and Tumblr.  Now that we know why memes are dragging your 12 year old cousin Tony down into the depths of subreddits, let's begin the process of  step 1.

Step 1: Have an Idea

Wikihow says to have an idea is the first step in becoming a meme.  Well my idea is to spread my face to furthest corners of the internet.  If that means personifying Edward Snowden and exposing the truth of who I am, then so be it; the Wizard of Jah has no time for the petty games.  I must achieve my dreams and establish myself within the ranks of internet memes alongside Bad Luck Brian, and even newcomer  hot shot Kenneth Rodriguez Bone (his middle name isn't Rodriguez but it sounds good).  So let us figure out what The Wizard has in mind as a potential meme idea.  First and foremost I could establish a meme on a funny picture that I have taken.  This is the most simple route, the picture must be relatable but also odd enough to the point that others will laugh at it. I have pictures of this magnitude.

Another route to take is to gain public eye somewhere, and attempt to be put on the news.  An outlandish stunt of this magnitude was pulled by an anonymous man by the name of Fred.  Yes anonymous Fred appeared on live television, and pronounced multiple profanities.  This boosted Fred into internet stardom, becoming a loved meme overnight.  So should I pull a public stunt in an attempt to gain internet stardom, and become the dank meme-lord of the internet? Probably not, I am trying to have a career after college.

After more research into the dankness of the memes, I have gained powerful insight into how to properly execute a meme.  Now this comes straight from the source of knowyourmeme.com.  A user Wheatley posted comment within a thread saying these are the most important materials for a meme to become dank, "You need one internet, Impact font, a vague grasp on pop culture, a few magnets, seven hours of sunshine, and seventeen hours of 4chan." (Dank meme guide list)  So I have the materials, the factual and theoretical backing, and the means to achieve my destiny.  Meme fame here I come.